A Rain of Leaves

The falling leaves of autumn teach me about letting go and passing away. I like to stand in the deep woods and watch the leaves rain down. Some seem to fall gladly and willingly, while others need to be shaken free by the wind. What I especially notice as I watch the leaves is just how easy it seems. One second the leaf is attached to the branch… the next second it is falling. The letting go seems effortless, and the descent is often slow and gentle. Watching this fills me with a sense of peace. I am quite sure that this is how I want to die. So I watch, and pay attention, every year. Trying to absorb the ease with which this happens and trying to take in just how easy letting go can be.

A friend recently asked “what do you do when things are hopeless?” (As a life coach people imagine I have the answer to questions like this). After some hemming and hawing I asked “what advice does your higher self have?” The response: Let go. Immediately followed by the question… but how do I do that? This is why I watch the rain of leaves every year.

While people typically connect the return of the light to the winter solstice, for me the light returns when the leaves fall. Living surrounded by woods, I see the light streaming through the branches as the canopy empties. The sun, sky, clouds and stars become visible in places they were hidden all summer. If you are contemplating letting go, look around to see where the light is streaming in. What is being illuminated? What is revealed that was once hidden?

My feet are crunching the leaves now when I walk through the woods. A thick layer of leaves is being laid down, providing a blanket of protection against the cold of winter and nourishment for next spring’s growth. This is the cycle of living and of dying. I imagine the leaves falling with a sense of relief and excitement… relieved that this part of their journey has come to an end and now they can rest. Excited about the transformation that will allow them to support the growth of the forest in a new and different way. In what ways do your experiences fertilize the ground for your next project or job, or just for tomorrow?

The One Thing I Know for Sure

The electronic universe has discovered that I am starting a new business. This has resulted in a plethora of e-mails every day that alert  me to the 5 Secrets of Attracting New Clients, the 3 Things I Must Must Not Do When Using Social Media, and the Sure Fire Way to Double My Income in a Month. They are all geared to assuring my success as an entrepreneur, and they all suggest that if I only do what they tell me that I will, in fact, succeed.

Well, my world is both more simple and more complex. Simple in that there is only one thing I know for sure: If you want to make something happen you need to Show Up and Do the Work. Complex because anyone that is paying attention knows that this can be a very difficult thing to do. Take, for instance, writing this blog. It is clear even to me that writing a blog is a good way to introduce myself to the world of potential life coaching clients. However, this means that I have to come to grips with a few facts of life. As an introvert, the act of writing a blog is all about becoming visible. This puts me on the shifting sands of risky business. The act of public writing forces me to swallow the belief that no one is interested in what I have to say. (Help me overcome this by leaving a comment... please!) Finally, blogging is just one piece of a larger challenge, which is to step out into the world in a new way. There are days when that scares the bejeezus out of me. And yet, to make this happen I need to show up and do the work.

There are so many other things I might be doing, but tonight circumstances have conspired to help me sit down and pound this out. It's raining. Nothing good is on TV. I've made a commitment to an accountability partner to write a blog post this week and next (it is often easier to just do something than it is to explain to someone why you didn't do it). And I have promised myself a reward when I finish this.

What are the things that keep you from taking the next step? Where do you find the support you need to stay focused on your goal? When was the last time you looked your fear in the face and then took the leap? If you are engaged in a process to bring something into being and are moving forward, give yourself a pat on the back and do something nice for yourself. Acknowledge that you have the motivation and fortitude to do this even if it's hard. If you're stuck... Find a way. Show up. Do the work.

Up to your tailpipe in mud

On the day they were moving my neighbor decided to back the moving van across the lawn and up to their front door. He did not stop to consider that it had rained for the last two weeks. Twenty feet in he felt the rear wheels sink into the ground. Realizing he was in imminent danger of getting stuck he did what many people might do in that situation: he stepped on the gas and spun the wheels. Fast.

Before he knew it he was, well, up to his tailpipe in mud.

 

This story has a happy ending. The tow truck operator and his 10-year old son did a crackerjack job of winching the moving van out of the trenches. The neighbors tumbled outside to enjoy the spectacle and catch up with each other after a long winter. At the end of the day, a good time was had by all.

Since I became a life coach in Ithaca I have been noticing all the different ways that people get stuck in their lives. Some people get trapped in the notion that whatever they do must be perfect. For others, the voices of family and friends are so loud that they can’t hear their own voice… or if they can, they are reluctant to act in defiance of what others are telling them they should do.  

How many of us have found ourselves doing the same thing over and over, expecting different results? Sometimes it is hard to imagine that there might be other ways of approaching a particular problem or situation. And sometimes we just really don’t know what to do next.  We may be confronted with too many options, or too few.  The next step is simply not clear. 

As a life coach I help people get unstuck. Working together we can explore your options, expanding or evaluating them as needed. We can dig through the layers of “should” to discover what is important to you and how you want to express yourself in the world. You can redefine perfection in a way that allows you to move forward with confidence. Combining practical, down-to-earth approaches with creativity tools and techniques, I help people overcome inertia and become re-engaged in their lives.

Are you ready to climb out of your rut?
Are you at a turning point and need to make an important decision?

Is it time to live your dream?

 

If you find yourself stuck in the mud and want to reduce stress and feel more comfortable
with who you are and what you are doing, contact me.